Granting a Family - Chapter 24: Pent Up Emotions

Completing his rounds and heading back to town, Nathan approached the spot by the pond where Elizabeth had ridden away on Sergeant after he confessed his love for her. A wave of nostalgia washed over him as he saw Sergeant grazing on weeds near the pond and Elizabeth, wearing her different shades of pink outfit he had seen her in many times, was sitting with her eyes closed on the same log she had waited for him before. Her eyes suddenly opened when she heard him approach on Newton and she seem genuinely surprised to see him.

“Oh my goodness!” she exclaimed. “Nathan, I wasn't expecting to see you or anyone out here this early.”

“Hello, Elizabeth. I try to get my out in the open rounds finished early during the summer to avoid the heat later in the day.” Nathan weighed whether or not he should stay. Being in this spot with her was bringing up all of the emotions he experienced that day.

“Would you like to come sit for a few minutes? I've been wanting to talk ever since I got back, but so much has been going on for both of us.” She patted next to her on the log and gave him a pleading look. “I understand if you have work to do.”

Nathan knew she could sense his hesitation, but he decided he had to face her sooner or later. He dismounted Newton and let him join Sergeant grazing. “I have a little time,” he said, sitting down next to her. He felt a little nervous just like he felt before many of their conversations, not being sure what to expect. They sat in silence for a minute, collecting their thoughts.

“I was sitting here thinking about what happened here last year,” Elizabeth began. “Sometimes I'm so full of regret, and just wish I could take it all back.” She looked off into the distance toward Bill's land that Nathan had been so excited about, but ultimately declined buying. “Like Bill's land...I feel responsible for you not settling down there with Allie.”

“We can't focus on the things we regret, Elizabeth. I didn't buy that land because my vision wasn't just about me and Allie, it included you and little Jack.” His admission made him so uncomfortable, he stood up and walked over to Newton where he pulled his canteen out of the saddle bag and took a big drink. He brought the canteen over and offered it over to Elizabeth. “It’s important to stay hydrated on these sunny summer days. Looks like a scorcher headed our way today.”

Reaching out to take the canteen, their hands brushed and Elizabeth felt that familiar energy that has always been there with Nathan. She took a drink of the cool, refreshing water and reflected on how thoughtful he was in little every-day ways. Lucas liked the attention and praise he got for the big, grand gestures and extravagant gifts and dates. Nathan went about giving of himself, thinking of others, and giving gifts that came straight from the heart. How had she been such a fool? Elizabeth took a good look at him in his Inspector uniform. Nathan had always been attractive in his red serge, but the Inspector look with the straight-legged pants and the different hat, really suited him and brought out his handsome features.

Elizabeth handed the canteen back to Nathan, and he returned it to the saddle bag before sitting back down again next to her. He took his hat off and smoothed his hair with his free hand. “Tell me all about the tour. According to Rosemary, you were a big success and your book is flying off the shelves.”

“Of course she would say such things,” Elizabeth said, rolling her eyes and chuckling. “The tour went alright. I loved meeting all the people who had so many questions about life on the frontier and me as a teacher and a mother. While I was out there I began to wonder what I was doing. I wrote the book about my life in Hope Valley, but there I was traveling from city to city and not home living that life. Lucas and his mother are not supportive of my teaching, and minimize my role as a mother. I was just lost, but things became so clear when I was away. I told Lucas the two of us would never work out, and he left. I was never in love with him.”

“I’m sorry things ended that way for you,” Nathan sympathized. “I’m proud of you for all you’ve accomplished, but I’ve always known your true callings were being a mother and a teacher. You were such a good teacher to Allie and so welcoming to us when we came to town. That couldn’t have been easy for you, and you forgave me after you found out about Fort Clay. I want to be there for you and little Jack like you were there for me and Allie. If you need anything, I hope you don’t hesitate to ask.”

Tears slowly moved down Elizabeth’s cheek and regret permeated her entire being. She slowly put her hand over Nathan’s, remembering how large they were compared to hers. He moved his other hand to cover hers and his eyes briefly caught hers. “Nathan, will you please forgive me for how horrible I was to you and Allie? I wish I could take it all back. I was so lost, but it was no excuse for my behavior.”

“I won’t lie and say I wasn’t torn apart, and Allie being hurt was an even bigger concern for me. But Elizabeth, everyone deserves forgiveness and redemption.” Nathan looked deep into her eyes and sincerely assured her, “I forgive you.”

“Thank you, Nathan.” Elizabeth’s heart was beating faster as they sat together in this spot where he had first told her he was in love with her. His stunning blue eyes were full of compassion and forgiveness, but she wasn’t sure if the love was still there. Suddenly feeling vulnerable and insecure she quietly muttered, “I’m just afraid I’m too late…” She let the thought drift off, not ready to vocalize all of her feelings yet. She stood quickly, breaking eye contact and letting go of his hands as she moved to untether Sergeant. “I need to get back to see little Jack before going to the school.”

“Right,” Nathan responded. “I have work to get back to as well.” He put his hat back on and grabbed Newton’s reins. He turned back as she was mounting Sergeant. “Elizabeth, everything is going to work out for you. Sometimes we don’t know where our lives are going to go, but eventually we find what we are looking for.”

“I really do want happiness for you, Nathan. I would like to talk again soon. I just have to get back to let Rosemary get to the newspaper office. She was kind enough to sit with Jack so I could get Sergeant out for a ride.”

“Give that little boy extra hugs from me.” Nathan smiled just thinking about little Jack Thornton. “Allie wants to take him fishing and riding again soon. We had a really fun time with him while you were gone.”

Fearing she would lose all control of her emotions, Elizabeth nodded and prodded Sergeant to hurry home. What a fool she had been to reject Nathan Grant who was such a selfless and giving man and father. They both believed that love was worth fighting for, and she was ready to fight for him...she just wasn’t sure if he wanted her back.

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Friday’s science experiment was learning about leavening agents in baking, and Kathryn helped teach the students how to mix up loaves of bread. They mixed up the dough and let it rise while they worked on other subjects, then they all followed her to the Bradshaw’s row house where they played games as they waited for the bread to bake. Once it was cooled enough to cut, they slathered pieces of bread with homemade strawberry jam and ate their delicious science project. They all agreed that this was the best tasting science ever. Thanking their teacher, the students disbursed for the weekend.

Anne came downstairs after smelling fresh baked bread, and Kathryn cut a big piece for her to enjoy. “This baby says ‘Thanks Aunt Katie’.”

“You’re welcome, sweet baby,” Kathryn babbled, rubbing her sister-in-law’s large, round stomach. “How are you feeling today, Anne?”

“As big as a house,” she complained. “But each week this baby stays inside of me, I’m grateful. Faith says as long as I make it two or three more weeks the baby should be just fine. Bed rest is not easy, but I will do anything to protect this little one.”

Kathryn couldn’t wait to meet her little niece or nephew, but also longed for the time she could bring her own children into the world. Her thoughts immediately went to Nathan and their brief conversation the night before when he got back from Benson Hills. She wanted to find out all the details and have more alone time with him, so she hoped he really did ask her to get together this weekend. Kathryn was also delighted about the bonding time she had gotten with Allie over the past week.

“Where did your mind go?” Anne asked her. “I think I know, but if you want to talk about it, I’m here and very bored.” 

Kathryn laughed and shook her head. “I have no idea what to say. I’m falling for another Mountie, and I think he is still hung up on the other school teacher.” She groaned and put her face in her hands.

“I’ve seen the way Nathan Grant looks at you, and I have no doubt he feels the same as you,” Anne tried to assure her. “As for Mrs. Thornton, from the sound of it, he was devastated when she rejected him. You don’t just get over something like that, especially when you’ve fallen for someone else in the meantime.”

A blush spread across Kathryn’s face and she sighed. “I better go get cleaned up and changed after baking bread with a bunch of teenagers. Do you need anything?”

“I think I’m going to stay downstairs where it’s a bit cooler and read a book, while possibly taking a little nap. If you wouldn’t mind grabbing my book off my nightstand?” Anne got comfortable, while Kathryn brought her book down before going up to freshen up and change. She soon discovered flour was in her hair and it seemed every inch of her body, so she decided a full bath was her best option. Soaking in the tub felt heavenly after her first week of summer class with the older children of Hope Valley. She was really enjoying getting to know all of her new students and their different personalities. Many of them were skeptical of her at first because of how much they loved Mrs. Thornton, but she felt good about the relationships of trust she was building with each of them.

After her bath, Kathryn tried on a lovely new off-white dress sent to her by Aunt Edith from her time in Montreal. It was light and flowy and had lace accents at the neckline, waistline, bottom of the sleeves, and near the bottom of the dress. She wondered how Nathan would react to her in something more modern that flattered her figure quite well. Hoping she really would get to see him tonight, she styled her hair with part up and out of her face and the rest down her back in wavy curls. She accented the dress with the emerald jewelry that had been passed down to her from her grandmother and perfectly matched her eyes. 

When Anne saw her come downstairs, she caught her breath. “Oh Kathryn, you look so gorgeous! You have to make sure and see Nathan tonight. Thomas is taking me to the café for one of our final dinner dates before the baby gets here, so you could invite him over here while we are gone.”

“Do you really think I should invite him? I told him to let me know when and where he wanted to meet.” While contemplating this predicament, Thomas came bounding into the house out of breath.

“Wow, Katie, what are you all dressed up for?” he asked, walking over to greet his wife with a kiss.

“I was just trying on this dress that Aunt Edith sent me,” Kathryn replied, self consciously.

“No, she’s getting dressed up for Inspector Grant,” Anne announced, giving her a wink. “Why don’t you go tell Nathan to meet Kathryn here at 7:00 when we go on our date to the café?”

“Great idea,” he agreed. “We’re just finishing up paperwork this afternoon so I will definitely see him. Would you like me to deliver a note?”

“Ok, sure,” Kathryn answered. “Let me go upstairs and write one, and change out of this dress while I cook and clean, then I can change back right before he comes.” She went up to her room and wrote a quick note, then changed into a dress more suitable for chores before heading back down to give the envelope to her brother.

“Thank you, Thomas. I’ll make sure Anne gets plenty of rest so she feels up to your date later,” Kathryn promised him.

“Hey,” Anne protested. “I don’t need anyone to look after me. Faith said things are looking good, and this baby is staying put for a while. If it will make you both feel better I will go take a nap before dinner. But I am going to get dressed up and get out of this house to spend some quality time with my handsome husband.” Ignoring her protests, Thomas picked up his petite wife and carried her up the stairs, with Anne breaking into giggles. He put her on the bed and kissed her dark curls before heading back to work at the Mountie office.

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Mike Hickam had a lot on his mind as he headed to the livery to get his horse so he could ride out to the pipeline construction site. He was so lost in his own thoughts that he almost ran right into a woman coming out of the livery. “I’m so sorry,” he began, then looked up only to be staring straight into the eyes of Elizabeth Thatcher Thornton. “Oh, um, Elizabeth, hello,” he stammered. “How are you today? Were you out riding Sergeant? How’s little Jack? I hope he hasn’t escaped the house again.” Mike realized he was rambling and speaking way too fast.

“Mike, hello,” Elizabeth uttered. “Yes, I’ve been trying to get Sergeant out as much as possible after being gone. As for little Jack, I had Bill put an extra lock on the doors that Jack can’t reach and escape. You really were such a lifesaver that night. I’m so grateful you found him when you did or he could have been out in the dark all alone.” Elizabeth put her hand on his arm, and as it tensed she felt how muscular Mike Hickam was, underneath the sleeve of his shirt. Feeling a little jolt of something, she quickly removed her hand from his arm and looked away, embarrassed. 

Her touch had made his heart beat faster, but the way she pulled away made Hickam feel oddly disappointed. Trying not to feel hurt, he tried to change the subject to make things less awkward. “So, Nathan is really good with little Jack. I saw them together while you were away, and he really is such a natural father.”

Elizabeth’s face lit up at the mention of Nathan fathering little Jack, but her expression changed to one of confusion and worry as she wondered where Nathan's heart was and if he still had the same feelings for her that he did last year. “Nathan has been good to us these past few years,” Elizabeth voiced, with a hint of sadness. “We are fortunate to have such a noble and selfless Mountie serving our community.”

“He is so good to everyone,” Hickam agreed. “Our community has also been blessed by having such a dedicated teacher the past nine years. I've watched how you've changed, all the while changing this town for the better. I've always admired you and your passion for Hope Valley and the people here. You are one of the only people I have felt like has noticed me all these years.” Once again feeling uncomfortable for being too personal, Mike cleared his throat and looked away. “I better get my horse ready to go. I hope you have a good day.”

“It was good to see you again, Mike.” Elizabeth smiled warmly at this good man who had been in Hope Valley these many years, and was solid and steady. “Again, I can never repay you for returning my most prized possession to me the other night. Good luck with your pipeline build. Be safe.” Those last words caught her off guard. She had said them to Jack and then to Nathan on occasion, but she wasn't quite sure what prompted her to say them to Mike Hickam just now. Not wanting to analyze her feelings for anyone, she quickly turned and headed for home leaving a bewildered Mike Hickam staring after her.

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Thomas burst into the Mountie office after his quick lunch break and found Nathan sitting at the desk, combing through paperwork. “I have something I think you are really going to like!” he exclaimed. “I have a personal invitation from my sister.” He handed the envelope to Nathan, who felt the color rising to his neck as he took the note. Not wanting to open and read it in front of Thomas, he excused himself and stepped outside. He sat in the chair right outside the door and opened the envelope, unfolding the enclosed paper with care. He couldn't help but smile when he read the note.

My Dearest Nate,

I would be delighted if you would join me for dinner tonight at my house. Thomas and Anne will be dining at the café this evening on a date, so we will have a chance to spend some time alone and talk. 7:00 sharp. I've missed you.

Yours Always,

Kate

Nathan smelled the paper to see if he could get the tiniest hint of her sweet scent. He closed his eyes and smiled at the thought of having another private dinner date with Miss Kathryn Bradshaw. He hoped all the work he had waiting for him would help the afternoon go faster. 

Thomas stuck his head outside with a little smirk on his face. “Hey, can I get a little help here with all these forms? I need you to focus a little so I can get out of here on time. I have a hot date with my gorgeous, but very pregnant and moody wife. She won’t be too happy if I’m late.”

Nathan stood and slapped Thomas on the back. “Let’s get to work so we can both get to our dates on time.” Both Mounties worked and laughed as they anticipated their evening ahead.

When they were almost finished with their work, Allie burst into the office with Anna, Emily, and Opal. “Dad, we are having dinner and playing games at Anna’s house. Is it ok with you if I go? We might sleep over if her mom gives the go ahead once we go talk to her.”

“That sounds great, Allie.” Nathan responded, almost relieved he didn’t have to leave her home alone while he was with Kate. He stood up and gave her a hug. She secretly loved it, but had to save face in front of her friends so she rolled her eyes and pulled away. “Let me know if you are sleeping over. If I’m not home, leave a note. No boys.” All of the girls giggled and promised it was girls only tonight. They left to go inform more parents of their plans, and Nathan went back to work. 

“I see I have some really fun parenting stuff to look forward to in the future,” Thomas observed. “I really do admire how you took on your niece and now she’s become your daughter. But she’s a pretty little thing, and you better have your shotgun ready against all the boys.”

“Or the boy,” Nathan lamented. “I like Robert, I really do. But Allie is way too young to be liking boys. This has been the first age that I really would prefer to have a woman help me understand what is going on in her head and how to handle things with her.”

By 5:30 everything was finished and the men were headed home to get cleaned up and ready for their dates. When Nathan approached Elizabeth’s house, he saw her sitting alone on her porch. When she saw him, she waved and began walking down the steps to meet him. 

“Elizabeth,” he greeted her. “Is everything ok?”

Looking nervous, she gave him her most convincing smile and asked, “Can we talk? Rosemary is watching little Jack for me, and I have something to say to you that can’t wait.”

Nathan felt unprepared for this conversation, but knew it was best it happened sooner rather than later, so he nodded and slowly followed Elizabeth into her house.